HR Masti and Making money

Actually they are two different things and deserve separate posts ... anyway here goes ...

1. HR Masti

An incident which happened in the HR class this week ... Prof was a pretty good one ... draws parallels to things in day to day life to explain HR concepts ... has good insights about the reasons behind the different kinds of policies that a company might have ...

Topic was about performance appraisals in organizations ... He asked the class about issues in this process.

(Switching from past tense to present tense ...)

A girl in class offers a point ... "During the period in which a person is appraised, he might have had a month of good performance and a month of bad performance for whatever reason ... The rating given to him should neither reflect the former nor the latter and should reflect only the average of his performance throughout the year" ...

The prof gets a bit disturbed upon hearing this point ... He raises his voice a bit and asks ... how can u take the average of performance ?!? if u r a boss, do u want a person who has spikes and troughs in his performance or uniform / consistent performance ?!? what would u want ?!?

He then moves on to an example in real life to make us understand ...

Let us say there is a pond of water whose "average" depth is 1 meter ... will cross the river without a boat ?!? Ur height would definitely be more than 1 meter ... why not cross ?!? Will u cross ?!? The girl, obviously, did not answer and was regretting having made the point (which is not @ all rare ... every person goes through this cycle every other day in class) ...

The prof has efficiently got across his point ... "average" quantities should NOT be used in certain cases ...

Everybody in the class is able to see the funda ... except for one guy ... Let us call him Tim ... Tim had been doing a lot of mugging the previous night and is unable to control nodding off in class ... He is blissfully unaware of the proceedings of the class, right from the point that Katyayini made her point ... And he is sitting in the first row ...

The prof is still a bit disturbed that such a simple thing has to be mentioned in class ... He is not getting the answer from this girl ... He looks around trying to catch anybody else who may answer ... Unfortunately, he takes a look @ Tim ...

"Tim ... Will you cross the river ?!?"

Tim woke up with a start !!! He has absolutely no idea about the context in which the question is asked ... He has to do some quick thinking ... reflects upon the last question which the prof directed at him ...

Answers "No Sir" ... Prof. is happy ... Tim is a bit relieved ... Thankful that his hunch based on the question alone was right ...

Prof. pushes Tim further ... "Why would u not cross" ... Tim is cornered now ... Wracks his brain wondering how crossing a river relates to any funda @ all in HR ... Gives up ... And then gave the answer which set the whole class in laughter for the first time since the course started ... It was as if a huge wall of ice broke at that single moment ...

"BECAUSE I WILL GET WET, SIR" !!!!!

Prof is like ... #@####$$$#@##$$ ... All his effort gone waste ... After all his effort, this guys talks about getting wet, of all things and not about drowning which was the crux of the argument !!!

"This is the first time in my teaching experience in PGP that I got such an answer ... I really do not know how to react ..." Thankfully the prof was in a good mood that day ...

Was a good ice breaker ... I am sure Tim will not doze off @least in HR class any further ...

2. Making money

What are the ways of making LOTS of money in this world ... I can think of two ways ...

a. Pursue whatever u love with the most intense passion ... Programming, balancing accounts, biking, painting, trading, gambling, marketing, pizza making, ... learning whatever is available in that field ... excelling in it ... attaining an advantage unique to u in that field ... ensuring that u retain the advantage relentlessly ... rest will fall in place ... the money will come sooner or later ...

OR

b. Become a Tahsildar ...

There was a particular form that I had to get filled by my parents and endorsed by a tahsildar ... Can u imagine the kind of money that was demanded for one signature ... FIVE THOUSAND BUCKS ... Yes ... u read it right ... That is more money that what a brilliant programmer in India - working in say, the world's best paying s/w company, makes in one WHOLE day ... And the income is not taxable either.

Quit dreaming of becoming / grooming ur wards as CAs / Doctors / Scientists / Engineers / Artists / Researchers / Armed force employees / Entrepreneurs ... Groom them into Tahsildars instead ...

What is it about ....

It has been almost 20 days since I reached this place ... One sentence to describe the change is "Like ABRUPTLY shifting to reverse gear, when I am cruising forward @ 80 Km per hour in 5th gear" ... Try doing it - u will not do it the 2nd time - ur gear box would have already broken apart !!!

Let me recollect a few things that I have observed about this insti ... Of course, this list is by NO way exhaustive ...

1. Brand building
2. Alumni strength
3. God level profs
4. Finding limits
5. Time consciousness
6. Support systems
7. Infrastructure
8. Sophisticated fun

1. Brand building : As the chairman of the programme mentions, each one of us has a responsibility. Responsibility to all the 43 batches who have passed out, responsibility to the batches studying currently and responsibility to the batches which are going to study here in the future. The stance that each one of us takes in the outside world might be construed as the stance of the insti ... Tomorrow when I go out and commit a crime ... my seniors working at different organizations are going to be mocked at by my actions ... This notion of my actions having a direct impact on the "community" is impressed in quite a few ways as soon as we come here ...

2. Alumni strength : This place has a very strong bonding with its alumni ... Get togethers happen every few months ... and there are ways and means by which a current can stay in touch electronically with all the batches which passed out since 2003 (am not sure about this number, though) ... in other words, the electronic n/w does not only span the batches in college but also spans those who passed out ... The implication of this close contact is that you cannot do something wrong and get away with it ... The minute you do something stupid (not funny-stupid, but serious-stupid), it becomes the talk of the town (actually townS, all over the world) ... the speed with which information travels is amazing ... Invariably, whenever you want to switch a job or start something new, it will by these seniors or juniors (yes, it happens both ways) who help you out ... You must have gotten it by now ...

3. God Level professors : There are some professors here who can ANY DAY apply to a harvard or a wharton and get the opportunity they seek ... some who can just do freelance consulting and make a fortune out of it ... a few profs here are supposed to be the world's best paid consultants in their respective fields ... to the tune of few thousand dollars per hour ... profs who bagged ALL the gold medals during their Ph.Ds in MIT / Harvard and missed only one or two ... those were missed because they were reserved for lady candidates ...

But, such God level professors leave such opportunities and have come to academia for the passion associated with it ... When such people take classes, there is a responsibility which is naturally thrust upon you ... You cannot fail the prof ... if he asks you to prepare something and attend the next class, you simply HAVE to do it ... Not because somebody is keeping a gun at your head ... But because of the respect that transcends on you, given the opportunity cost that he is incurring ...

4. Finding limits : The work load is pretty high ... Sleeping for just 3 or 4 hours a day (including weekends) is unimaginable to anybody ... Actually, v go thru this in stages ...

a. before entering college : seniors say so ... v think "i am going to be very organized ... no time waste ... study all the waking hours ... sleep for 6 hours properly"
b. immediately after entering college : a flurry of activities happens around us ... do not even realize what is going on ... realize that u r running madly from one dorm to another at 1 AM ... doing activity which v otherwise would not have done - given that another God Level Prof is going to take the first class the next day morning .... What happened to the resolve - v wonder ....
c. slowly you get used to the grind ... realize that you cannot survive unless you put in the extra hours ...
d. manage to do it ... yes - u oversleep every now and then ... but on the whole you ARE able to do it ...
e. clench your fist for one long year ... go into the 2nd year ... and give gyan to the incoming batch ... as if sleeping 4 hours is child's play for you and have been doing it ALL your life and it is SO unreasonable that the new guy should find it difficult ;-)

5. Time consciousness : Deadlines for certain academic submissions are officially given as 23:59:59 ... When they say that, they mean that 1 second beyond that is NOT acceptable ... A very high level of time consciousness is maintained in this place ... Profs set a precedent for us ... I am yet to see or hear about a prof who comes late to class ... For a 9:00 AM class, the prof will walk in at 8:58 AM ... He will watch the seconds hand approach 9:00 AM and start the class only when it does strike ... Some professors lock the classrooms @ 9 ...

6. Support systems : The system hits everybody hard ... The toughest ones emerge as toppers ... Most of the others survive ... But, there are a few who cannot take the pressure ... The system recognizes this effect and has lots of checks and balances ... There is a deparment which can help listen to your woes ... it will arrange a psychologist if you need ... it will not document anything about ur case and it will never be discussed with anybody else ... there is another program - the mentor-mentee relationship ... where each prof in the college is aligned with 4 or 5 first year students ... they play the role of an elder brother / elder sister outside the classroom ... the seniors in college also do a great job here ... each group of 10 first years are assigned 3 or 4 second years ... it is known as the buddy system ... u can talk to them / disturb them / get doubts clarified whenver you want .... there is another dorm buddy system ... where each first year is aligned with a second year candidate within the dormitory ... such checks and balances ensure that nobody looses their senses wading their way through the system ....

7. Infrastructure ... You have enough things to worry about ... Having to stand in a queue in the computing center whould not be one of them ... Sitting in a cramped class would not be one of them ... Basically, there is no worry about the infrastructure available ... Air conditioned classrooms, a top class mess (I am enjoying the food out here), individual rooms, telephone connection in each room, wired internet connectivity in each room, an email / electronic noticeboard system which are the lifelines here, a canteen which is open till 4 AM in case u miss the dinner preparing for some class, a canteen which door delivers in your dorm room (ya - believe me, they do for a price) if you are not able to step out for some reason or the other, an air conditioned library which I believe functions till 2:00 AM ... the list is endless ...

8. Sophisticated fun ... Yup ... above and beyond all this, the people here do have fun ... There are rain dances ... dorm cricket ... dorm traditions ... dorm treats ... birthday parties ... intra college fun events .... talent nights ... inter college b school competitions ... tempo shouts ... ramp parties ... We have one @ midnight tonight .... Now, I am talking in the second person and not in the first person ... I am yet to figure out how to beat the system and have fun ... But, find out - I WILL !!!

Please do leave a comment yaar ... I spent an hour drafting this !!!